saheli

A friend indeed: Saheli shows the way

DNA / Puja Pednekar / Saturday, July 10, 2010 1:35 IST

When she was traveling north from Bangalore, Laxmi was kidnapped from a train platform in Mumbai. She was only 12 at the time. The kidnappers forced her into prostitution.

Although she is no longer a sex worker herself, Laxmi has become a brothel owner, a peer leader, and a strong voice for safer sex among her “girls.” She simply tells them and their clients, “Either you listen to me, or you will die of this disease.”

Laxmi is a Bai (a mother or elder woman), participating in the Saheli Project, a peer education program for commercial sex workers (CSWs) that focuses on sexual health and social welfare. The Saheli Project started in 1991 as an initiative of the People’s Health Organisation.

“We realized that to help the sex workers, we needed to work at the community level. It had to be a self-help and peer-based model,” said Suresh Churi, one of the social workers involved in the project. It focuses on the red light areas of south Mumbai, including Falkland Road, where an estimatmed 2,000 prostitutes ply their trade.

The Saheli Project works within the existing hierarchy - top, brothel managers in the middle, and “regular” sex workers at the bottom to create its own pyramids.

It selects leaders from the three groups to raise awareness about HIV and sexual health issues among their peers. For every 25 regular sex workers, Saheli chooses one leader to be the Saheli, which means “friend” in Hindi. And for every 10 Sahelis, the organization chooses one brothel manager, or Tai, which means elder sister.

By educating one Bai, 10 Tais, and 100 Sahelis, the Saheli Project can reach 2,500 female sex workers. The project now covers about 5,500 sex workers in Mumbai and also has a program in Pune. “Once we pass the message onto one girl, it gets passed on to the others,” said Laxmi.

The project has a mobile clinic that provides primary health care and distributes condoms to south Mumbai’s red light areas every Saturday. It also offers referral services for those who need further care and treatment, as well as counseling and support services.

Every Friday, the Saheli Project and the National Association for the Blind provide eye treatment for the women in the Falkland Road area. Here they get glasses, treatment for eye infections, and cataract surgery, if needed. Laxmi said, “All my friends are happy now because they are getting treatment and care and their needs are being met.”

The Sahelis receive Rs150 per month for one hour of peer education work a day, and the Tais receive Rs700 per month for part-time daily work in peer education or Rs1,500 for full-time work. Bais do not receive stipends for their peer education work because they are considered to be of senior stature in the social hierarchy.

“Sex workers are in a trade where they are paid for each act. We feel obliged to pay them if they are giving up their time for our project,” said Churi. “We pay them in lump sums every two to three months, but we also provide them with ID cards, which means much more to them than economic incentives. They take this as a badge of pride.”
URL of the article: http://www.dnaindia.com/speakup/report_a-friend-indeed-saheli-shows-the-way_1407741-all
Permission to reprint or copy this article or photo must be obtained from www.3dsyndication.com


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cheating

Cheating Quotations

~ To cheat oneself out of love is the most terrible deception; it is an eternal loss for which there is no reparation, either in time or in eternity ~
Soren Kierkegaard

~ I would prefer even to fail with honor than to win by cheating ~
Sophocles

~ One must not cheat anybody, not even the world of one's triumph. ~
Franz Kafka

~ To be trusted is a greater compliment than to be loved. ~ George MacDonald

~ Integrity is not a conditional word. It doesn't blow in the wind or change with the weather. It is your inner image of yourself, and if you look in there and see a man who won't cheat, then you know he never will. ~
John D. MacDonald

~ It is better to suffer wrong than to do it, and happier to be sometimes cheated than not to trust. ~
Samuel Johnson

~ If you marry a man who cheats on his wife, you'll be married to a man who cheats on his wife. ~
Ann Landers

~ The first and worst of all frauds is to cheat one's self. All sin is easy after that. ~
Pearl Bailey

~ To cheat a man is nothing; but the woman must have fine parts, indeed, who cheats a woman. ~
John Gay

~ You can't cheat the public for long. ~
Tennessee Ernie Ford

~ It takes a long while for a naturally trustful person to reconcile himself to the idea that after all God will not help him ~ Henry Louis Mencken

~ Cheating is often more efficient. ~
Jeri Ryan

~ The sure way to be cheated is to think one's self more cunning than others ~
FranÁois de la Rochefoucauld

~ 'Tis my opinion every man cheats in his own way, and he is only honest who is not discovered ~
Susannah Centlivre

~ Do not be too moral. You may cheat yourself out of much life so. Aim above morality. Be not simply good; be good for something. ~
Henry David Thoreau

~ He that's cheated twice by the same man is an accomplice with the cheater ~
Unknown

~ He who purposely cheats his friend, would cheat his God ~ Johann Kaspar Lavater

~ Children are the most desirable opponents at scrabble as they are both easy to beat and fun to cheat. ~
Fran Lebowitz

~ There are very honest people who do not think that they have had a bargain unless they have cheated a merchant ~
Anatole France

~ Someone who thinks the world is always cheating him is right. He is missing that wonderful feeling of trust in someone or something. ~
Eric Hoffer

~ It is impossible for a man to be cheated by anyone but himself. ~
Ralph Waldo Emerson

~ God cheats men into living on by hiding how blest it is to die ~
Lucan

~ Three things are men most likely to be cheated in, a horse, a wig, and a wife ~
Benjamin Franklin

~ He who praises me on all occasions is a fool who despises me or a knave who wishes to cheat me ~
Chinese Proverb

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betrayal

Betrayal Quotations

~ When a woman wants to betray her husband, her actions are almost invariably studied but they are never reasoned. ~ Honore de Balzac

~ Betrayal does that -- betrays the betrayer. ~
Erica Jong

~ Betrayal can only happen if you love. ~
John Le Carre

~ To betray you must first belong ~
Harold Philby
Jeab Genet

Betrayal is about learning not to idealize external sources. ~ Linda Talley

~ One should rather die than be betrayed. There is no deceit in death. It delivers precisely what it has promised. Betrayal, though ... betrayal is the willful slaughter of hope. ~
Steven Deitz

~ We have to distrust each other. It is our only defence against betrayal. ~
Tennessee Wellians

~ Betrayal is the only truth that sticks. ~
Arthur Miller

~ Each betrayal begins with trust. ~
Phish

~ It is most true, stylus virum arguit, - our style betrays us. ~
Robert Burton

~ Anything may be betrayed, anyone may be forgiven, but not those who lack the courage of their own greatness. ~
Ayn Rand

~ Love is whatever you can still betray ... Betrayal can only happen if you love. ~
John LeCarre

~ Every betrayal contains a perfect moment, a coin stamped heads or tails with salvation on the other side. ~
Barbara Kingsolver

~ Anyone who hasn’t experienced the ecstasy of betrayal knows nothing about ecstasy at all. ~
Jeab Genet

~ All a man can betray is his conscience. ~ Joseph Conrad

~ They talk of a man betraying his country, his friends, his sweetheart. There must be a moral bond first. All a man can betray is his conscience... ~
Joseph Conrad

~ I hate the idea of causes, and if I had to choose between betraying my country and betraying my friend, I hope I should have the guts to betray my country ~
E. M. Forster

~ In politics it is necessary either to betray one's country or the electorate. I prefer to betray the electorate. ~
Charles de Gaulle

~ No soul of high estate can take pleasure in slander. It betrays a weakness. ~
Blaise Pascal

~ O lovers! Be careful in those dangerous first days! Once you’ve brought breakfast in bed you’ll have to bring it forever, unless you want to be accused of lovelessness and betrayal. ~
Milan Kundera

~ Then you should have died! Died, rather than betray your friends, as we would have done for you! ~
Joanne Kathleen Rowling

~ I sometimes react to making a mistake as if I have betrayed myself. My fear of making a mistake seems to be based on the hidden assumption that I am potentially perfect and that if I can just be very careful I will not fall from heaven. But a 'mistake' is a declaration of the way I am, a jolt to the way I intend, a reminder I am not dealing with the facts. When I have listened to my mistakes I have grown. ~
Hugh Prather

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affair

Affairs Quotations

~ Affairs are loaded with romanticism, morality, mythology, and intense emotions. ~
Emily Brown

~ In all human affairs there are efforts, and there are results, and the strength of the effort is the measure of the result. ~
James Lane Allen

~ In the affairs of this world, men are saved not by faith, but by the want of it. ~
Benjamin Franklin

~ The best love affairs are those we never had. ~ Norman Lindsay

~ Desperate affairs require desperate measures. ~ Horatio Nelson

~ One cannot manage too many affairs: like pumpkins in the water, one pops up while you try to hold down the other. ~
Chinese proverb

~ Human affairs are so obscure and various that nothing can be clearly known. ~
Desiderius Erasmus

~ How much folly there is in human affairs ~
Persius

~ Fate rules the affairs of mankind with no recognizable order. ~
Seneca

~ Few friendships could survive the moodiness of love affairs. ~
Mason Cooley
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sex-health-education

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wrong-diagnosis-erectile-dysfunction-ED

Here we will be seeing treatment of ED Erectile Dysfunction that does not require medicine.

During 1st sexual experience excitement is high. Having managed privacy he engages in foreplay. Any of the three things that happen on attempting sexual intercourse give rise to mistaken belief that the guy has ED Erectile Dysfunction.

1

The discharge of semen - ejaculation - is quick. This may happen during foreplay even before attempting insertion of penis in vaginal passage. His attempt at insertion is foiled. This makes him so nervous and dejected that he begins to believe that he has PREMATURE EJACULATION (wrong diagnosis). When he attempts some other time he is consciously observing with uncertainty if sexual intercourse will be alright. This diverts his attention, which causes less erection. Now he labels himself as suffering from ED (mistaken diagnosis).

2

On first attempt with no experience & knowledge (knowledge - meaning - what you are reading here)there is very high level of unnerving doubt, "Will I be able to do sex?" Erection (stiffness) in the penis (Dick)wanes. He believes (wrong diagnosis) he is patient having ED Erectile Dysfunction.

3

In the 3rd scenario attempts of thrusting are to no avail. The passage (vagina - cunt) does not let the penis in. He labels himself as patient having ED(Erectile Dysfunction). This too is wrong diagnosis.

IMPORTANT:

Not being able to insert penis in vagina is not uncommon experience, especially when the girl is virgin.

MOST OF THE SELF DIAGNOSIS DONE BY PEOPLE WHO SURF FOR INFORMATION ON THE INTERNET IS WRONG. THIS IS GOOD NEWS. IT MEANS THEY ACTUALLY DO NOT HAVE ED ERECTILE DYSFUNCTION. HENCE, WITH GUIDANCE FROM SEX THERAPIST THE SAME DEJECTED MAN LEARNS PENIS-VAGINA SEXUAL INTERCOURSE, EVEN WITHOUT ANY MEDICINE.

These type of wrongly diagnosed people get good results from counseling given by sex therapist. Thus, the man/couple distressed due to ED Erectile Dysfunction (wrongly diagnosed) is capable of enjoying penis-vagina sexual intercourse (fucking) as normally as anyone else.
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how-to-choose-best-treatment-erection-problems

Starting therapy with the least invasive option seems a logical strategy.
Counseling is recommended because examination, evaluation and choice of therapy can be decided by the same health care professional- Sex Therapist.

Placebo can work wonders along with counseling.

Perineal muscle exercises have to be incorporated in 'Counseling Program', by the Sex Therapist.
Pelvic-floor exercises do not involve any risks, and they are painless. The dropout rate is less than for other interventions and treatment modalities. If treatment is successful, the erection is spontaneous, and this in contrast to injection therapy and use of a vacuum pump or penile prosthesis. The cost of the therapy is low, but the patient needs to be motivated to perform the exercises 90 times daily at home for a period of 4 months.

Results indicate the need for further investigation. Randomized controlled trials are needed to define the efficacy of physical therapy in the treatment of erectile dysfunction.

Conclusion

Comparing the results of a protocol that can be administered by a physical therapist reported here with other interventions shows that a pelvic-floor muscle program is a possible noninvasive alternative to treat patients with erectile dysfunction caused by venous occlusion.

A Controlled Study to Evaluate the Impact of a Psychosexual Assessment on Treatment Adherence and Satisfaction in Men with Erectile Dysfunction
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counseling-best-treatment-erectile-dysfunction

COUNSELING/GUIDANCE/PSYCHOSEXUAL THERAPY/PSYCHOTHERAPY

Counseling is the BEST treatment for Erectile Dysfunctions.
Even if other treatment is used Counseling has to be added to the treatment.

COUNSELING IS BEST

PROS
Psychotherapy may be the intervention of choice for the patient with primarily nonorganic erectile dysfunction, such as that caused by depression. Psychotherapy can be valuable as an addition to medical or surgical interventions.

CONS
Unfortunately, there are very few follow-up studies examining the long-term effect of this intervention. Withdrawal from psychotherapy is common.

Scientifically speaking, the lack of a placebo control group and random allocation of patients to groups in study and in other trials using these approaches limit the usefulness of the results.

A Controlled Study to Evaluate the Impact of a Psychosexual Assessment on Treatment Adherence and Satisfaction in Men with Erectile Dysfunction
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perineal-exercise-treatment-erectile-dysfunction

Excerpt from study on Erectile Dysfunction and Pelvic Floor Exercises.

Different treatment options are available:
psychosexual counseling,
medication,
use of external vacuum devices,
intracavernous injection therapy,
vascular surgery, and use of a
penile prosthesis.

These exercises are known by different names

PELVIC FLOOR
PERINEAL MUSCLE
PUBOCOCCYGEUS MUSCLE
KEGEL'S EXERCISE

RESULTS
In this study, 47% of the patients regained normal erectile function, and 24% had an improved erection after a pelvic-floor re-education program in combination with EMG biofeedback and electrical stimulation. Six out of 51 patients requested another modality of therapy after cessation of the physical therapist intervention.

The results of study are in the line with the findings of

Mamberti-Dias and Bonierbale-Branchereau and Claes and colleagues.
The results of Schouman and Lacroix for patients with erectile dysfunction were less favorable, but their sample size was small.
Colpi et al reported that only 36% of the patients in their study recovered or improved following pelvic-floor muscle exercises for venogenic impotence.


BENEFITS OF PELVIC FLOOR EXERCISES
Physical therapy interventions provide noninvasive methods that are easy to perform, painless, and inexpensive. Studies have shown positive results after a pelvic-floor re-education program for men with erectile dysfunction. However, different programs were used, and some studies had a small sample size. Data from subjects who did not complete the studies were not included in the analyses, and predictive factors were not investigated. The aims of our study were to test an outpatient pelvic-floor re-education program in men with erection problems and to identify factors that could predict therapeutic outcome.

A Controlled Study to Evaluate the Impact of a Psychosexual Assessment on Treatment Adherence and Satisfaction in Men with Erectile Dysfunction
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